I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a cliff, ready to (bungee) jump. The excitement and anxiousness brewing together - this is so unreal. (Although I've never bungee jumped before I can imagine myself feeling that way) .Exams are on Tuesday and I feel like someone/something has pushed me off the cliff. But I know I'm going to be okay.
I studied closely with a friend last year and got goodish results. Unfortunately she's away for year in industry so I had a thought I might do badly this year, my final year. But I thought it was all in the mind. I can actually do this. This is my chance to prove to myself that I can be an independent learner, that I don't have to rely on others all the time. It cant be a coincidence that I found a good friend who will be away on the year when my house needed another person to make 4 of us. If she stayed here doing a BSc instead, life would be so different. But she isn't doing the Bsc. She isn't here. I say it's a test perfectly laid down by God. Does God test people? If so, why? Side tracking now to God but I shall save it for another post. It's my bedtime now and I have to wake up early to memorise some inorganic chemistry!!
Bon nuit
Monday, May 20, 2013
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Transition
I've decided to merge my older blog to this one. Oldest one dates way back to 2006 when I was a crazy, easily excited teenage girl (with spellingz like dis). A lot of the posts are nonsense I must admit (some really emo ones too), sometimes I feel ashamed/embarrassed for these old posts. But over the years I could see change in myself as I dug deeper into the archives, I discover more of myself.
So if you would like to have a blast from the past to see the 'old' (young in age) me, go ahead.
So if you would like to have a blast from the past to see the 'old' (young in age) me, go ahead.
Saturday, May 11, 2013
What do I want
Many times this question pops up, especially of late because I'm graduating very soon and up to now I have no idea what I want to do.
In my previous post, I mentioned that I will be on holiday at Shetland. Best part is that I'll be on the bike most of the time. Everyone who knows me will know that I love nature. I also love to cycle. So this is a two in one and I simply can't say no to that! But there's something more to this trip other than these two facts. This is the first time, in a very long time, that I've found something that I really wanted to do. Here's why:
The taste of adventure - to a land unknown to me
My first outdoor adventure took place 4 years ago, when I hiked at Brecon Beacons, and Peak District for the Duke of Edinburgh gold award. I happily volunteered for it due to peer pressure without knowing what I was getting into. During the trip, thoughts of a fluffy pillow, proper food, dry socks, and a warm bed came to mind. I just wonder what would I think of in the next trip?
Also, I'll be on a 14 hour ferry trip from Aberdeen to Lerwick. My father said the North Sea is beautiful. I thought to myself: don't all seas look the same?
My connection to nature
I grew up with many pets around me, with National Geographic being my favourite TV show as a kid. I am fortunate enough to travel to see not only big cities, but the quiet and peaceful little villages of China, where the people were very close to nature - and I always envied them for that. I just watched a video recently on a lady who hunt for her own fish in the ocean. Most importantly, she observed the fish and whatever sea creatures which make up the ecosystem and 'appreciates that she knows where her food comes from and that it had lived a wild and free life'. And I liked what she said.
I saw nothing but sheep (and lots of sheep poop) during the last hike. I hope I get to see some wild birds, ponies, seals and otters (killer whales if I'm lucky!!) at Shetland. I may not get close to some of the wild life, but perhaps I can make a connection with the ponies :)
On a separate yet related note, I read a book called 'City of the Beasts' by Isabel Allende where the story is based at the Amazon. It's pretty spiritual and I think my connection to nature is a spiritual one.
How does this relate to what kind of work I want to do after I graduate? Perhaps nothing. Should I be working for WWF? That could be an option. Can I work in a chemical firm to make 'good' chemicals clean up the 'bad' ones? I want to do something that I'm really passionate about. In order to maintain my relationship with nature I should take care of it - like how you would do the same to your loved ones.
However, this is completely different from what my parents had in mind. Unless they don't mind their daughter being the head of an environmental NGO :)
In my previous post, I mentioned that I will be on holiday at Shetland. Best part is that I'll be on the bike most of the time. Everyone who knows me will know that I love nature. I also love to cycle. So this is a two in one and I simply can't say no to that! But there's something more to this trip other than these two facts. This is the first time, in a very long time, that I've found something that I really wanted to do. Here's why:
The taste of adventure - to a land unknown to me
My first outdoor adventure took place 4 years ago, when I hiked at Brecon Beacons, and Peak District for the Duke of Edinburgh gold award. I happily volunteered for it due to peer pressure without knowing what I was getting into. During the trip, thoughts of a fluffy pillow, proper food, dry socks, and a warm bed came to mind. I just wonder what would I think of in the next trip?
Also, I'll be on a 14 hour ferry trip from Aberdeen to Lerwick. My father said the North Sea is beautiful. I thought to myself: don't all seas look the same?
My connection to nature
I grew up with many pets around me, with National Geographic being my favourite TV show as a kid. I am fortunate enough to travel to see not only big cities, but the quiet and peaceful little villages of China, where the people were very close to nature - and I always envied them for that. I just watched a video recently on a lady who hunt for her own fish in the ocean. Most importantly, she observed the fish and whatever sea creatures which make up the ecosystem and 'appreciates that she knows where her food comes from and that it had lived a wild and free life'. And I liked what she said.
I saw nothing but sheep (and lots of sheep poop) during the last hike. I hope I get to see some wild birds, ponies, seals and otters (killer whales if I'm lucky!!) at Shetland. I may not get close to some of the wild life, but perhaps I can make a connection with the ponies :)
On a separate yet related note, I read a book called 'City of the Beasts' by Isabel Allende where the story is based at the Amazon. It's pretty spiritual and I think my connection to nature is a spiritual one.
How does this relate to what kind of work I want to do after I graduate? Perhaps nothing. Should I be working for WWF? That could be an option. Can I work in a chemical firm to make 'good' chemicals clean up the 'bad' ones? I want to do something that I'm really passionate about. In order to maintain my relationship with nature I should take care of it - like how you would do the same to your loved ones.
However, this is completely different from what my parents had in mind. Unless they don't mind their daughter being the head of an environmental NGO :)
Avalanche
I thought I should give this space an update, after all it is where I get my thoughts organised! Zishen insisted anyway. I have a couple of sad looking drafts. One on Germany which was ages ago (it needs to be finished!!) and the other sounded really doom and gloom (or emo). I should therefore make this a happy post!
Many happy things lately, maybe it's because I've been going to church more often, getting a lot of positive vibes from the people I meet there, young and old.
I have many things to look forward to in the summer mainly my graduation and my holidays before I head home, which includes a biking adventure at Shetland (will see puffins and Shetland ponies with GR and SK) and trip to southern Spain with my dear! And after that I'll be arriving home - the land of the wet and sticky, back to my house with the familiar feels and sounds: the sound of water, the sound of the wind chime, and the cool floor beneath my feet.
I'm pretty excited to go job hunting. Finally something different, a new chapter! Best part is that I'll see my parents everyday and wouldn't have to leave them any time soon. It's going to feel so strange being back, I can imagine it already.
That's all I have in mind at the moment. Time for me to regain my energy after my food poisoning incident. I have such loving people around me :) SK made porridge for lunch, Ee Mun made chicken soup for dinner (note that these are stomach-friendly) and Zishen let me nap in his warm room and he went to co-op just to buy me an isotonic drink! So so so blessed <3
Over and out.
Many happy things lately, maybe it's because I've been going to church more often, getting a lot of positive vibes from the people I meet there, young and old.
I have many things to look forward to in the summer mainly my graduation and my holidays before I head home, which includes a biking adventure at Shetland (will see puffins and Shetland ponies with GR and SK) and trip to southern Spain with my dear! And after that I'll be arriving home - the land of the wet and sticky, back to my house with the familiar feels and sounds: the sound of water, the sound of the wind chime, and the cool floor beneath my feet.
I'm pretty excited to go job hunting. Finally something different, a new chapter! Best part is that I'll see my parents everyday and wouldn't have to leave them any time soon. It's going to feel so strange being back, I can imagine it already.
That's all I have in mind at the moment. Time for me to regain my energy after my food poisoning incident. I have such loving people around me :) SK made porridge for lunch, Ee Mun made chicken soup for dinner (note that these are stomach-friendly) and Zishen let me nap in his warm room and he went to co-op just to buy me an isotonic drink! So so so blessed <3
Over and out.
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