hmm..should i write another emo entry? haha o well here goes..might as well let it all out here better than trapped in my head..

Im 50% sad..50% happy..

>50% sad (?)

1 year 3 months 9 days.
I thought we could last longer than that..i guess in this case time doesn't matter..what matters is how strong we are. At first I was just thinking hard whether should i stay with him eventhought i'll be going to UK. When i finally found the will to stay strong..my bridge of effort that i built crumbled before me. A single brick from the bridge..thats all it tkaes to bring it down. Before i knew about the "news" ..i thought the time after spm will be the greatest ever! i always said to him :'everything will be ok after spm :D' or 'I cant wait till spm is over cuz by then we'll be happy once again :)'

I wonder what was he thinking when i said all that to him..very guilty? Sad? Or maybe even nothting at all! He hurt me so much..does'nt he know that?! Maybe he does..he just doesn't care..yet he says he cares..this whole thing is confusing me. I cant believe this is happening. There are tons more reasons on why im sad..but i just dont wanna repeat everything..im still trying to get it over with i guess..

<50% happy (?)

ok so there is only ONE reason why im happy. We broke up without fighting. its more to stuff like : ' Hope you get a future bf/gf which treats you better' bla bla bla you know? But now im starting to become..erm..less happy..the way he is now..sigh..